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8/21 - “Good season, can count the humiliations on one hand”
By The Stabbing Pen | August 21, 2008
Well, our LA Parks Department Double-A Recreation baseball team, the Blue Sox, have finally reached the conclusion to our season. We finished 9-6, and made the playoffs — not a bad season. However, I can still recall 3 moments of intense humiliation from it.
The first one is the most obvious. I’m referring to our 12-0 loss, which was our quick exit out of the first round of the playoffs.
I can’t forget my wonderful 0 for 5 game early in the season either, in which I struck out 4 times, and popped out in my final at-bat. In an effort to achieve some form of symmetry, I was sure to strike out twice swinging, and also twice looking. It was a “feng shui golden sombrero.” I just couldn’t hit the pitcher’s curveball at all, and every time I took it, it was a strike.
As much as I’ve been trying to forget that, it doesn’t even compare to taking a shit in the bathroom at the Algin Sutton field. I mean, I wouldn’t necessarily describe the surrounding area as the ghetto — but it was definitely in that vicinity.
THERE WERE NO STALL DOORS. It wasn’t an ideal situation, but I had to go. There was no choice. There’s an obvious reason why I don’t want to join the military. I also intend on avoiding any time spent in prison.
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