The Stabbing Pen

2010 (49)

• 3/9 - “Normal Bozzzy texting” (0)
• 3/8 - “I’m a community activist now” (0)
• 3/7 - “Shirtless bartenders” (2)
• 3/5 - “Is that your swagger, or are you injured?” (1)
• 3/4 - “Wouldn’t it be awesome if…” (0)
• 3/2 - “When I grow up, I want to be a sideline reporter” (0)
• 3/1 - “Tic Tacs and Kit Kats” (0)
• 2/27 - “That’d be too comfortable” (0)
• 2/25 - “Don’t buy Bailey’s Irish Cream” (0)
• 2/24 - “If no risk of casualties, where I’d like to be during an earthquake” (1)
• 2/22 - “There’s no excuse for seats with obstructed views” (0)
• 2/21 - “Woman with cat in traffic” (1)
• 2/20 - “I’m gonna be bad” (0)
• 2/18 - “Quick silly one” (0)
• 2/17 - “Home Alone sends weird messages to kids” (0)
• 2/16 - “White sneakers prove mom wrong” (1)
• 2/15 - “Letter shaped groins and such” (0)
• 2/13 - “Grandaddy issues” (1)
• 2/12 - “More ignorance in L.A. when it comes to Italian food” (2)
• 2/10 - “Defending the bridge (bitchstick)” (1)
• 2/9 - “An easy way to mess with people” (2)
• 2/8 - “Oooooh, you law breaker” (0)
• 2/6 - “Maybe you’re better when you ACTUALLY place the bet!” (0)
• 2/4 - “How to improve Groundhog Day” (1)
• 2/3 - “Experience scary, funny, and sad all within 30 seconds” (0)
• 2/2 - “Maximum heights for feistiness” (1)
• 2/1 - “You have to earn those upper-case letters” (0)
• 1/30 - “Defending celebrity Lakers fans” (1)
• 1/28 - “Another example of why cats are so smart” (2)
• 1/27 - “Rain and timing” (0)
• 1/25 - “Quirky people, smooth people” (1)
• 1/24 - ” Missed call” (0)
• 1/22 - ” It’s okay, pay whatever you want” (0)
• 1/21 - “Soon it’ll be only sporks” (2)
• 1/20 - “Criticism (and support) of marathon runners” (0)
• 1/19 - “Avatar 2: Avatard” (2)
• 1/18 - “A moment at the gas station” (1)
• 1/17 - “Football hijinks” (0)
• 1/14 - “Cute girls don’t drive vans” (3)
• 1/13 - “Why no 24 hour Chinese food?” (1)
• 1/12 - “Smog pizza” (1)
• 1/10 - “Text or call?” (2)
• 1/8 - “Gay boobs” (0)
• 1/7 - “Don’t worry, I will tell you how much weed I want” (2)
• 1/6 - “What stops me from breaking parking meters?” (1)
• 1/5 - “Epsom salt — does it all?” (0)
• 1/4 - “No PJ’s at work” (1)
• 1/2 - “Phone number switcher backers” (0)
• 1/1 - “Please walk on the escalators” (2)

2009 (261)

• 12/30 - “Hard to shop for” (0)
• 12/28 - “What do sheep herders count before they go to sleep?” (0)
• 12/27 - “Remember Winamp?” (0)
• 12/24 - “Trains in Los Angeles” (2)
• 12/22 - “Lefty air guitar” (1)
• 12/21 - “Rubbernecking has it’s time and place” (2)
• 12/20 - “I don’t believe in seasonal colors” (0)
• 12/17 - “Grandpa Sammy’s eulogy” (4)
• 12/16 - “Tiger Woods — what’s so shocking about all this?” (1)
• 12/15 - “I like gum, sometimes a lot” (4)
• 12/14 - “A snowman is atheist” (1)
• 12/12 - “Rare booger event” (0)
• 12/10 - Grape Blow Pops — actually good” (2)
• 12/9 - “My style in a nutshell” (0)
• 12/8 - “Eggnog sucks” (2)
• 12/7 - “Vibrators, dildos, blow-up dolls, Fleshlights, and society” (2)
• 12/6 - “That should be your status” (0)
• 12/5 - “It’s okay, you can use my bathroom” (2)
• 12/3 - “Being one’s own worst enemy is not so bad” (1)
• 12/2 - “Apparently my co-workers like me” (0)
• 12/1 - “Was Hitler ticklish?” (0)
• 11/30 - “Force your kid to play music” (0)
• 11/27 - “Rather be a VIP than a very important person” (1)
• 11/19 - “One man’s filler is another man’s treasure” (1)
• 11/18 - “Don’t ask me if your girlfriend is hot” (1)
• 11/17 - “I don’t have much sympathy for people attacked by animals” (1)
• 11/16 - “I found another Jew for you” (1)
• 11/14 - “I hate the insert key” (4)
• 11/12 - “Philosophy on killing bugs” (3)
• 11/11 - “You look tired…gee thanks” (5)
• 11/9 - “Alicia Keys is in denial of her black heritage” (0)
• 11/8 - “More kissing in porn” (1)
• 11/6 - “For couples, TV is more important than religion” (1)
• 11/5 - “Shit, I’m turning into my dad” (0)
• 11/4 - “Kudos to Dan Aykroyd” (1)
• 11/3 - “Me and my pajama pants” (5)
• 11/2 - “Soul mates” (0)
• 11/1 - “No wonder Detroit is bankrupt” (3)
• 10/30 - “Cell phone pocket positioning” (0)
• 10/29 - “Hydrox the dog” (2)
• 10/27 - “Fashion-forward” (1)
• 10/26 - “Wear a Halloween costume, thanks” (3)
• 10/25 - “Strange microwave times” (0)
• 10/24 - “Rearranging keyboard keys is a good prank” (1)
• 10/22 - “Handshaking girls” (2)
• 10/20 - “De-dustifier” (1)
• 10/19 - “Heavenfood” (2)
• 10/18 - “Naked, but with belt with cupholders” (0)
• 10/16 - “Adolescent girls and soy sauce” (0)
• 10/15 - “Good channel flippers” (2)
• 10/13 - “Fuck SOME cops” (2)
• 10/11 - “Kid Hunters” (0)
• 10/9 - “The Charlie Murphy of cooking” (0)
• 10/7 - “Halloween-themed parks scare me” (0)
• 10/5 - “Something’s gotta be done about straight line cleavage” (1)
• 10/3 - “Tattoo misspellings” (2)
• 10/2 - “When I poop I think of you, but in a good way” (0)
• 10/1 - “Back off, I have a lawyer” (0)
• 9/26 - “What if Chad Ochocinco gets traded?” (1)
• 9/23 - “Perhaps some regrets about Spanish” (1)
• 9/22 - “Some sympathy for rabbits” (1)
• 9/21 - “Record keeping in the post-nuclear world” (0)
• 9/20 - “The more I sobered up, the hotter you got” (0)
• 9/19 - “I’m good with names” (0)
• 9/16 - “Changing religions is not as weird” (0)
• 9/15 - “Changing political parties is weird” (0)
• 9/13 - “I’m clean, but be careful with the white underwear” (0)
• 9/12 - “Peeling labels is classy and romantic” (0)
• 9/9 - “I should probably be writing porn” (0)
• 9/7 - “Jets fans are nomads…too” (0)
• 9/6 - “Baffled by mustache people” (3)
• 9/5 - “Quickest orphan of all time” (0)
• 9/4 - “Amputees are most sexually generous? (0)
• 9/2 - “Some stuff on last names and marriage” (4)
• 8/31 - “Um, Mike Tyson still sucks” (0)
• 8/30 - “That’s what you’ve been up to?” (0)
• 8/28 - “Women on their periods in Britain” (1)
• 8/27 - “Discovery Zone for adults” (1)
• 8/25 - “Lyrics without music” (1)
• 8/23 - “What makes a good ringtone” (1)
• 8/22 - “Phillies fans are nice assholes” (2)
• 8/19 - “The existence of god versus love” (0)
• 8/18 - “The best kind of murderers” (3)
• 8/17 - “Posting injury pics” (1)
• 8/15 - “Free advertising on t-shirts” (1)
• 8/13 - “Wolfenstein – trivializes the Holocaust?” (0)
• 8/12 - “Don’t touch my hair” (0)
• 8/11 - “White people like NCAA more than NBA basketball” (2)
• 8/10 - “White people Madea viewing party” (0)
• 8/8 - “Yankee Stadium’s name isn’t what you think” (1)
• 8/6 - “Online dating and the pain it forward” (0)
• 8/5 - “Sleeping Alone t-shirt” (5)
• 8/4 - “Less angry at drivers of fancy cars” (0)
• 8/3 - “Self-hating species” (0)
• 7/30 - Most retarded commercial ever” (2)
• 7/28 - “People food follow-up: Centrum Multivitamins & baby food” (0)
• 7/27 - “Vikings should sign Michael Vick instead of Brett Favre” (1)
• 7/25 - “Imitation is NOT NECESSARILY the highest form of flattery” (0)
• 7/23 - “Walter Cronkite Memorial Chicken Dinner” (0)
• 7/21 - “Send in someone else” (3)
• 7/20 - “You don’t notice when things don’t happen” (0)
• 7/19 - “Hotels with clean rooms” (2)
• 7/17 - “Funny George IM exchange” (2)
• 7/16 - “Not The Staples Center” (2)
• 7/14 - “The liberal media & Obama’s first pitch conspiracy” (0)
• 7/13 - “Solution to flimsy baby necks” (2)
• 7/12 - “Gandhi, kids, and school” (3)
• 7/11 - “Restaurant hat etiquette” (2)
• 7/9 - “Michael Jackson shoulda recorded Thriller around 2001″ (2)
• 7/8 - “Endy Chavez defies science” (1)
• 7/7 - “People who look insane, but might not be insane” (2)
• 7/6 - “Ghosts of our forefathers in Whole Foods” (1)
• 7/4 - “Fireworks on TV, lol” (4)
• 7/3 - “You’re not my father!” (1)
• 7/2 - “National Examiner too irresponsible for even a rag” (1)
• 6/30 - “Rx on TV” (1)
• 6/28 - “Free medical advice from the CVS pharmacist” (0)
• 6/27 - “What’d you do with my mountains?” (6)
• 6/25 - “One more Iran disclaimer” (1)
• 6/24 - “Iraq, Iran, more sadness” (2)
• 6/23 - “Maybe I’ll start carrying a motorcycle helmet around” (3)
• 6/22 - “A couple of irritants in spoken language” (2)
• 6/21 - “How you know it’s a pretty good fart…” (3)
• 6/20 - “Um, none of us have dial-up” (2)
• 6/18 - “John Smith does not like this” (4)
• 6/17 - “Turning Lakers riots into something positive” (1)
• 6/16 - “One more thing on Palin/Letterman” (0)
• 6/15 - “People who say they hate religion” (14)
• 6/14 - “Employees must wash hands” (4)
• 6/13 - “How I can recognize a spam comment” (2)
• 6/11 - “Kelley and her crazy baseball stats” (1)
• 6/10 - “Pretty much a pre-mixed Vodka-Red Bull” (0)
• 6/9 - “Mom joke of the day” (2)
• 6/8 - “March Madness conspiracy 3 months later” (3)
• 6/7 - “Donald Trump is just absurd” (1)
• 6/6 - “Chopper nearby” (3)
• 6/4 - “United States of Australia” (0)
• 6/3 - “Some thoughts on winking” (4)
• 6/2 - “Just porn alone isn’t good enough for me anymore” (0)
• 6/1 - “Breathalyzers should really come with all cars” (2)
• 5/31 - “Fuck that, Ryan Phillipe should be photographing me” (3)
• 5/29 - “I try to do Windows update but it goes to Google English instead” (2)
• 5/27 - “Too lazy to turn around, so just send it to me” (3)
• 5/26 - “Name for a big clit” (5)
• 5/25 - “Get rid of helmets II: This Time in Roller Derby” (7)
• 5/23 - “The devil returns every 25 years” (0)
• 5/22 - “Let’s pause for a moment of room tone” (1)
• 5/21 - “What happens if the entire Denver Nuggets team gets arrested?” (1)
• 5/20 - “Beer cans that let you know when they are cold” (6)
• 5/19 - “When instant messaging lyrics to Bozzz turns dirty” (7)
• 5/18 - “Facebook funeral photos” (2)
• 5/17 - “You look more Jewwy in that color” (1)
• 5/16 - “But I wanted to yell at Manny” (0)
• 5/15 - “Do your own dental work” (0)
• 5/13 - “Carlos Beltran is Moletran” (2)
• 5/11 - “Check for 26 cents” (3)
• 5/10 - “Oh, this dog/cat musta’ been abused when he was younger” (5)
• 5/8 - “Fast food dates” (3)
• 5/6 - “Unconditional Facebook love for Obama” (3)
• 5/5 - “Ways to greatly improve glory holes” (2)
• 5/4 - “Is the Dirty Sanchez is out of style?” (2)
• 5/3 - “Kitty applying to be my accountant?” (4)
• 5/2 - “Pimp my wheelchair” (2)
• 4/30 - “Don’t you feel like crying?” (3)
• 4/28 - “Fast food chefs” (4)
• 4/27 - “Michael Vick is a better person than Barry Bonds, really America?” (3)
• 4/26 - “Jennie-O Turkey Burgers” (1)
• 4/25 - “Too lazy to download music illegally” (3)
• 4/23 - “Carrie Jensen should be one of Obama’s economic advisors” (6)
• 4/22 - “Slow and painful death for Myspace” (5)
• 4/21 - “I guess I’m not that afraid of a nuclear bomb” (3)
• 4/19 - “What is the proper way to eat French fries?” (4)
• 4/18 - “DeFrankos somehow landed in Van Nuys, California” (2)
• 4/17 - “Rules for choosing your second favorite team” (2)
• 4/16 - “Celebrities should stop adopting kids from foreign countries” (2)
• 4/14 - “Don’t judge a movie by it’s premise” (2)
• 4/13 - “Mos Def sounds like/is an idiot” (2)
• 4/12 - “Idea for Facebook - What kind of poop are you?” (3)
• 4/11 - “I want to go back on a meal plan” (2)
• 4/10 - “Kittens, dating, and IM-ing people who aren’t there” (5)
• 4/9 - “Grandma and her ridiculous jokes” (4)
• 4/8 - “Question about Billy Joel’s Keeping the Faith” (4)
• 4/7 - “I hate it when the cat makes me feel guilty” (5)
• 4/6 - “People with name tags” (4)
• 4/5 - “Slumdog Millionaire should’ve starred Regis Phibin” (1)
• 4/2 - “Reflections in the toilet” (5)
• 4/1 - “Help me I’m blind” (4)
• 3/31 - “Idea for skit/game” (2)
• 3/30 - “Upside down money” (3)
• 3/28 - “People who buy tuna in vegetable oil” (1)
• 3/26 - “My debut greatest hits concept album” (2)
• 3/25 - “Wtf was I trying to say?” (2)
• 3/24 - “I hate self-proclaimed street smart white people” (2)
• 3/23 - “Spinoffs with the animals” (2)
• 3/22 - “Networking” (1)
• 3/21 - “Instead of going on a weekend trip, let’s get sex changes” (1)
• 3/19 - “I want video games to be MORE violent” (0)
• 3/18 - “Hey, this isn’t so bad actually” (3)
• 3/17 - “Apparently degenerate criminals feed the homeless” (3)
• 3/16 - “Addicted to and in love with their iPhones” (1)
• 3/15 - “That’s my car!!!” (1)
• 3/14 - “3/12/09″ (4)
• 3/12 - “Spew-sday nights” (0)
• 3/11 - “Buddha is fat, has terrible circulation, and is bad for the economy” (2)
• 3/10 - “It’s official” (0)
• 3/9 - “God might be trying to kill you” (0)
• 3/8 - “NAAFCPNKAA” (2)
• 3/6 - “Minimum for a circle jerk is 5″ (0)
• 3/5 - “Mental patients with perfect teeth” (0)
• 3/4 - “He roofied himself” (0)
• 3/3 - “Please don’t bow to me, Mr. Chinese delivery guy” (3)
• 3/1 - “Just like you people, I build up a tolerance.” (0)
• 2/28 - “Nothing’s going around” (0)
• 2/27 - “Wouldn’t touch that with Bea Arthur’s dick” (0)
• 2/26 - “From now on, I open whatever I want in Target” (0)
• 2/25 - “Animals, children, environment, or human rights” (2)
• 2/24 - “I’m taking a break” (0)
• 2/23 - “Creepers on the yellow” (0)
• 2/22 - “Well-timed fart” (0)
• 2/21 - “Rather be a D-Fish than a bird” (0)
• 2/19 - “I’m fat, but educated about good health” (0)
• 2/18 - “Buddy buddy has a negative connotation somehow” (0)
• 2/17 - “No 3/5 compromise here, the homeless count!” (0)
• 2/16 - “SAP button reversal” (1)
• 2/15 - “Catering to the people via Evite” (0)
• 2/14 - “Bowling outdoors” (0)
• 2/12 - “I couldn’t resist” (0)
• 2/11 - “Continued to be awed by technology” (0)
• 2/10 - “Annoying guy-pothetical questions” (0)
• 2/9 - “My hair is still famous” (0)
• 2/8 - “Good impression” (0)
• 2/6 - “C’mon not now, I just showered!” (0)
• 2/5 - “By the way our machines are down” (0)
• 2/3 - “Colorblind roommates: worst interior decorators ever” (0)
• 2/2 - “Super Bowl philosophy update” (0)
• 2/1 - “Dear Conan O’Brien,” (0)
• 1/31 - “Analysis of handwriting analysis” (0)
• 1/29 - “T-i-t” (0)
• 1/28 - “Grandma’s dental politics” (2)
• 1/27 - “Traffic jam on toast, please” (0)
• 1/26 - “Spitting image” (0)
• 1/24 - “Old people & answering machines” (0)
• 1/23 - “Snuggie follow-up” (0)
• 1/22 - “Semi-attractive people are more dangerous to society” (0)
• 1/21 - “Could never live in the country” (0)
• 1/19 - “Fly or swim” (0)
• 1/18 - “I do my part” (0)
• 1/17 - “When I’m not looking” (0)
• 1/15 - “Those birds were probably terrorists” (0)
• 1/13 - “Seems most NCAA athletic directors have tiny penises” (0)
• 1/12 - “Okay fine, I guess I see why they hate us” (0)
• 1/11 - “I still think Pizza Hut is evil” (0)
• 1/10 - “People I may or may not know” (0)
• 1/9 - “Beating the game most anticlimactic thing ever” (0)
• 1/8 - “Apparently mom’s texting now” (0)
• 1/7 - “It would’ve been nice if Israel would’ve emailed me” (2)
• 1/6 - “Movie Movie” (0)
• 1/5 - “He’s Leon Washington made by the Japanese” (0)
• 1/4 - “Jewish New Year’s Resolutions” (0)
• 1/2 - “Business proposal for Alyssa Milano” (0)
• 1/1 - “Not a real chipwich” (0)

2008 (300)

• 12/31 - “The Snuggie” (0)
• 12/29 - “Mutts are hot, but maybe not all of ‘em” (0)
• 12/28 - “Shitty toy drive” (0)
• 12/26 - “Toothpaste is toothpaste” (0)
• 12/25 - “Teams like the Milwaukee Brewers are communist cry-babies” (0)
• 12/24 - “Can’t help it” (0)
• 12/23 - “Murderers won’t be at Bingo” (0)
• 12/22 - “Manhunt = Hide & go seek” (0)
• 12/21 - “Buffalo Bills fans are geniuses, sort of…” (0)
• 12/20 - “Pre-pup agreement” (0)
• 12/18 - “Don’t rely on Ikea for everything” (1)
• 12/17 - “Nobody gives a shit about Santa’s health” (0)
• 12/16 - “There no way I’m not writing about somebody throwing a shoe at our president” (1)
• 12/15 - “Santa Claus and his ho-ho-hoes” (0)
• 12/14 - “All the fun sucked out of unemployment” (0)
• 12/13 - “When absurdity pwns sportsmanship” (1)
• 12/11 - “I refuse to text Pizza Hut” (1)
• 12/10 - “The future of ankle monitors” (0)
• 12/8 - “Eventually, I imagine” (1)
• 12/7 - “Whoa” (0)
• 12/6 - “Gay and not gay by the arbitrary rules I’ve concocted” (0)
• 12/5 - “Considerate parker” (0)
• 12/4 - “Bad football fans and the kickers who make them money” (1)
• 12/3 - “Freakshow in Obama’s cabinet, please” (0)
• 12/2 - “Addition to Carlin’s soft language” (0)
• 11/30 - “Cooking shows are not pornographic to fat people” (0)
• 11/29 - “Serving 18 year olds alcohol: a minor problem?” (0)
• 11/28 - “Five star one star reviews” (0)
• 11/27 - “Befores & afters” (0)
• 11/22 - “Cancelling our date will require a 24 hours notice” (2)
• 11/21 - “Have they’ve tried this stunt yet?” (0)
• 11/20 - “Alaska t-shirt issues” (0)
• 11/19 - “I’ll have my poke back now, please” (0)
• 11/18 - “Props to late night hosts and their animal guests” (0)
• 11/17 - “Consequences for slow service” (0)
• 11/16 - “Friend Power Rankings” (0)
• 11/15 - “Another racist joke/Obama knows Bo” (0)
• 11/14 - “Black joke of the day” (0)
• 11/13 - “Idea for reality/game show” (0)
• 11/12 - “Coffee from everywhere” (0)
• 11/11 - “Vote ignorantly for our Veterans” (0)
• 11/10 - “Sensible rules and regulations for endzone celebrations” (0)
• 11/9 - “Power of the buddy icon” (0)
• 11/8 - “Interracial step sibling dating” (0)
• 11/7 - “Guilty pleasures” (0)
• 11/5 - “The President and his nipples” (2)
• 11/4 - “Bozzz on sex and the voting process” (1)
• 11/3 - “Smoking, atmosphere, and people I wish didn’t exist” (1)
• 11/2 - “Offensive costume procedures, part II” (0)
• 11/1 - “Offensive costume procedures, part I” (0)
• 10/31 - “That’s it, I’m voting for George W. Bush again” (0)
• 10/30 - “Per gallon” (0)
• 10/29 - “Aww-worthy” (2)
• 10/28 - “Baked Cheetos!” (0)
• 10/27 - “Another Bozzz convo I just find” (0)
• 10/26 - “Ice cream man playlist” (1)
• 10/25 - “Always leave the movies satisfied” (0)
• 10/23 - “Maybe he didn’t know!” (0)
• 10/22 - “In the morning straight, that night a cocksucker” (0)
• 10/21 - “Them Orientals are gooder at the learning” (0)
• 10/20 - “You’d be fucked, Bambi” (0)
• 10/19 - “I guess I’m on the SNL sucks bandwagon” (0)
• 10/18 - “Fun in the sun” (0)
• 10/17 - “Homeless will” (0)
• 10/16 - “Old school gay” (1)
• 10/15 - “The real ugliness behind Sarah Silverman’s political agenda” (0)
• 10/14 - “I want to be a turtle” (0)
• 10/13 - “Cindy’s funny” (0)
• 10/12 - “I’ve known you 2 months, so now I’ll name my kid after you” (0)
• 10/10 - “Beatings in Public(x)” (0)
• 10/8 - “Why don’t they call it that?” (0)
• 10/7 - “How smart is my cat?” (0)
• 10/6 - “Take this, avoid hangovers” (0)
• 10/5 - “Not so fast” (1)
• 10/3 - “2-ply toilet paper: highly inefficient” (1)
• 10/2 - “Really scared of getting killed by a train” (1)
• 10/1 - “Sure, I’ll take my boots off…and smack you in the face with them” (0)
• 9/30 - “Gaseous unborn children” (0)
• 9/29 - “Philosophy” (1)
• 9/28 - “Best way to make weight…” (0)
• 9/27 - “You know who I look like…” (0)
• 9/25 - “All photos at once” (0)
• 9/24 - “Fuck Pizza Hut and their trickery” (1)
• 9/23 - “Ah, I feel better” (0)
• 9/21 - “What else is on the menu, bitch?” (0)
• 9/20 - “Not a pedophile!” (0)
• 9/18 - “More on quarters / retarded soda machine from heaven” (0)
• 9/17 - “Change for the sake of change?” (0)
• 9/15 - “Alternative fundraisers” (0)
• 9/14 - “Robot orgy” (1)
• 9/13 - “Right back where I started from” (0)
• 9/12 - “Carson Daly defies logic” (0)
• 9/11 - “The worst thing you can do is fart” (0)
• 9/9 - “We’re all addicted to Krackel” (0)
• 9/8 - “Breaking down video with Bill Belichick” (0)
• 9/7 - “At least it was while he was alive” (0)
• 9/5 - “Extras and craft service for really really low budget films” (1)
• 9/4 - “Stupid answer to a stupid question” (0)
• 9/2 - “Compromise in the workplace” (1)
• 9/1 - “Still don’t understand the restaurant grading system” (1)
• 8/31 - “How to impress me at Karaoke” (0)
• 8/30 - “Quick question about the selection of Sarah Palin” (1)
• 8/28 - “Skateboarding age limit” (1)
• 8/27 - “All I want is a nearby Walmart so clean that I can eat off it’s floors” (0)
• 8/26 - “Tuxedo t-shirts” (1)
• 8/25 - “Bathroom attendants” (1)
• 8/23 - “Once you give ‘em money, you can say anything” (0)
• 8/21 - “Good season, can count the humiliations on one hand” (0)
• 8/20 - “Judges? It’s a snack” (0)
• 8/19 - “Newsweek made me laugh” (0)
• 8/18 - “No public restrooms” (0)
• 8/17 - “Bad name for a party” (0)
• 8/16 - “Who cares about swimming anyway, I guess” (0)
• 8/14 - “Legendary cluelessness” (0)
• 8/13 - “Let’s see some poor sports(wo)manship” (0)
• 8/12 - “BFF’s, TBF’s, and terrible logic” (0)
• 8/11 - “Has actress Mary Steenburgen had plastic surgery?” (0)
• 8/9 - “Why do some people want to knock me down from my high?” (0)
• 8/8 - “Can retards — uh, the mentally challenged vote?” (2)
• 8/7 - “I have another call coming in, hold on” (0)
• 8/6 - “Not the place for a joke” (0)
• 8/5 - “If I get hit by a bus tomorrow, please delete my Myspace/Facebook” (0)
• 8/4 - “9-1-1 doesn’t care about Shia LeBeouf” (1)
• 8/3 - “If you don’t buy this Butterfinger, I will surely lead a life of crime” (0)
• 8/1 - “Nobody Beats the Wiz, well until they went out of business” (0)
• 7/31 - “D-Wade’s mom: horrible speller” (3)
• 7/30 - “It came out wrong” (0)
• 7/28 - “Just like crying” (0)
• 7/27 - “Hopefully Henry Wyatt won’t be so stupid and so uncultured” (0)
• 7/26 - “Plastic bag ban – horrible idea” (2)
• 7/24 - “The only people more bizarre than actors are acting teachers” (0)
• 7/23 - “Remedy to elevator awkwardness” (1)
• 7/22 - “I forgot I was a corporate sell-out” (1)
• 7/21 - “Twist on corporal punishment” (1)
• 7/20 - “I don’t give a shit about first ladies” (0)
• 7/19 - “Ice makes me angry” (1)
• 7/17 - “I was wondering…” (0)
• 7/16 - “More great progress from the human race” (0)
• 7/15 - “I’m not worried about you” (1)
• 7/14 - “Look at him, so human-like” (0)
• 7/13 - “I see dead people watching dead people if they’re watching The 6th Sense” (0)
• 7/12 - “Sick of Bangkok jokes” (0)
• 7/11 - “Is it gay to…?” (0)
• 7/9 - “Ideal living room” (0)
• 7/8 - “Guitar stor-ies” (2)
• 7/6 - “I can’t wait until winter. Yeah I said it!” (1)
• 7/5 - “Quick note on the Barney’s jukebox” (0)
• 7/4 - “Tell him/her I say hello” (1)
• 7/3 - “Scare-cut” (2)
• 7/2 - “Stdmatch.com” (1)
• 7/1 - “Leave your glasses on” (0)
• 6/30 - “Nobody really likes cotton candy” (1)
• 6/29 - “Chasing hors d’oeuvres” (0)
• 6/27 - “End of innocence” (0)
• 6/25 - “Enemy confusion” (1)
• 6/24 - “Stupid kitty, fucking up my air mattress” (0)
• 6/22 - “Jews for Jesus” (0)
• 6/21 - “Link rules” (1)
• 6/20 - “I don’t get it, but then again I’ve never tried it” (1)
• 6/18 - “Just let her pee in her pants like a normal kid” (0)
• 6/17 - “Church parking” (0)
• 6/16 - “Conversational road signs” (1)
• 6/15 - “You never gonna get this, but I’ll drink that thank you” (1)
• 6/14 - “I still plan to sue Excalibur” (1)
• 6/12 - “People who think they can find anything on the Internet IV” (1)
• 6/11 - “Tough to delete selected texts” (2)
• 6/10 - “Leftover globs” (2)
• 6/9 - “Worst gift ever and I need it” (1)
• 6/8 - “See, it wasn’t me” (0)
• 6/6 - “Keep speed addicts around for rides” (0)
• 6/5 - “I guess the health teacher forgot to mention that one” (2)
• 6/4 - “More on covers” (0)
• 6/3 - “Add that to the iCal” (1)
• 6/2 - “Holey earrings” (0)
• 6/1 - “I’d like to thank the Academy and Manny Ramirez” (0)
• 5/31 - “Guys pay $20 cover, girls are free” (1)
• 5/30 - “Prison bus nonsense” (0)
• 5/29 - “Star Wars for chicks” (3)
• 5/28 - “Pennies, urinals, and Jewish stereotypes” (2)
• 5/27 - “Please look at my food” (0)
• 5/26 - “Fake Myspace page” (2)
• 5/24- “Gum is a connector, not merely an adhesive” (1)
• 5/23 - “Top 10 list of bodily sensations not including orgasm” (0)
• 5/21 - “NBA promos disprove racist theories” (0)
• 5/20 - “Checker Cab Company encourages DWI’s” (0)
• 5/19 - “What I wanna name my first daughter” (1)
• 5/18 - “Myspace at work for Myspace” (0)
• 5/17 - “Some more stuff on Mohawks” (1)
• 5/14 - “The Lunchtruck” (3)
• 5/13 - “Birthday freedoms” (1)
• 5/12 - “I don’t wanna be a superhero” (0)
• 5/11 - “Start walking” (1)
• 5/9 - “2 songs in 1″ (0)
• 5/7 - “Losers” (0)
• 5/6 - “Only Dave runs in place” (0)
• 5/5 - “Couch jumping” (1)
• 5/4 - “The $2 bill” (0)
• 5/3 - “I can’t imagine what this fucking maniac was looking for” (0)
• 5/2 - “Do we trust each other or not?” (0)
• 5/1 - “M&M’s, Nickelodeon, and a sign I’m coming of age” (2)
• 4/30 - “Jew photographers are much smarter than country hicks and 15 year old pop stars” (0)
• 4/29 - “Happy Day Jomo” (1)
• 4/28 - “Snoop blogg” (1)
• 4/27 - “Is there something about my personality that invites these incidents?” (1)
• 4/26 - “AT&T, you won’t win” (0)
• 4/24 - “Fingernail painting” (0)
• 4/23 - “Not white guys” (0)
• 4/21 - “Seder perversion” (0)
• 4/19 - “Impressed by your restraint” (0)
• 4/18 - “Ouija Board is a piece of shit game” (0)
• 4/17 - “I dare you to buy something other than Heinz ketchup” (0)
• 4/15 - “Another good survey/test for some Harlem residents” (0)
• 4/13 - “Countries without the Internet” (0)
• 4/12 - “Facebook is probably out of control” (0)
• 4/11 - “Bozzz doesn’t understand me anymore” (0)
• 4/10 - “I wonder if that’s what happened to the elastic in my underwear” (0)
• 4/9 - “Smell my finger and you’ll be amazed — I know I am” (1)
• 4/8 - “Some guys are pussies when it comes to ketchup” (1)
• 4/6 - “Celebrity wife cookbooks” (0)
• 4/5 - “New Michael Jackson theory” (0)
• 4/4 - “Soap trick” (1)
• 4/2 - “But how do I taste?” (1)
• 4/1 - “Suggestions for office pranks” (0)
• 3/31 - “Baffled by Vitamin water” (0)
• 3/29 - “America sucks, but all the Chinese love the Tibetans” (0)
• 3/27 - “I bet some of ‘em got killed for a sandwich” (0)
• 3/26 - “You might wanna reset the treadmill” (0)
• 3/25 - “Can I actually donate that?” (0)
• 3/24 - “Non-sexual rape” (1)
• 3/23 - “I guess I shouldn’t ever really complain about high school” (1)
• 3/22 - “A sign I may have given up on humanity” (1)
• 3/21 - “What did Jesus do on Saturday?” (1)
• 3/20 - “Enough already with the goddam Jesus in the clouds” (0)
• 3/18 - “Sounds like a board game to me” (0)
• 3/17 - “Govern yourself” (0)
• 3/16 - “Missing hikers in a small upstate NY town” (0)
• 3/15 - “Lumberjack Iraq” (0)
• 3/14 - “Forget McCain, Obama, or Clinton, I’m voting for Judge Judy” (0)
• 3/13 - “Little League dynasty and the miracle game” (2)
• 3/11 - “Save the environment in places where it’s most fucked up” (0)
• 3/10 - “Who’s calling?” (0)
• 3/8 - “Fever justification” (0)
• 3/6 - “Shit in the dark” (1)
• 3/5 - “American Idol producers are such pieces of shit, and they do such a good job too” (1)
• 3/4 - “Big surprise, Moses was high” (0)
• 3/2 - “The Nyquil challenge” (0)
• 3/1 - “Admissions about sunglasses” (0)
• 2/29 - “Feeling sad in the future” (0)
• 2/26 - “I’ll be in the other room if you need something” (0)
• 2/25 - “Guilt-free attraction to Ellen Page” (0)
• 2/24 - “Condoms in strip clubs” (0)
• 2/23 - “So what do you think that is?” (0)
• 2/22 - “C’mon Ralphs, just gimme a fucking milk crate” (0)
• 2/21 - “The term Internet stalker is used way too freely” (0)
• 2/20 - “What if there’s more than one Ryan Seacrest?” (2)
• 2/19 - “Give the beef to them” (1)
• 2/18 - “Beef recall” (0)
• 2/17 - “Strippers must hate Motley Crue” (0)
• 2/16 - “Johan Santana will probably win 25 games” (1)
• 2/15 - “Bozzz and the counting of the cocks” (0)
• 2/14 - “Gymnasts and their periods” (0)
• 2/12 - “Fine, I’m impressed” (0)
• 2/11 - “He said it, not me” (0)
• 2/10 - “People who criticized Michael Jordan for playing baseball” (0)
• 2/9 - “Big deal, it smells like fish” (1)
• 2/8 - “Assume she’s spreading all kindsa shit” (0)
• 2/7 - “I refuse to bury that flag” (1)
• 2/6 - “Sound of snot” (0)
• 2/5 - “Investigative journalism” (0)
• 2/4 - “$49.95 on PPV” (0)
• 2/3 - “Grilled cheese sandwiches” (0)
• 2/1 - “Only a real schmuck watches the Super Bowl at a bar” (1)
• 1/31 - “Avoiding gym tours” (1)
• 1/30 - “Brett Butler’s mom is Nostradamus” (1)
• 1/29 - “Perfect spot” (0)
• 1/28 - “Hair update” (0)
• 1/27 - “Dead fish in a public tank” (0)
• 1/25 - “I didn’t change, sue me” (0)
• 1/24 - “It’s not you, it’s the car” (0)
• 1/23 - “Would somebody please go “Tonya Harding” on Tom Brady?” (0)
• 1/22 - “More on salmon burgers” (0)
• 1/21 - “Joe Buck, Troy Aikman, and the rest of Fox cheated you” (2)
• 1/19 - “Arnica Montana: cocaine to battered and ashamed wives” (0)
• 1/18 - “Where’s my Britney Spears made for TV movie?” (0)
• 1/17 - “I guess Mace is for chicks” (0)
• 1/16 - “God values sneezing more than coughing” (0)
• 1/15 - “Wow, not a bad day at all” (0)
• 1/14 - “Hitting she-males” (2)
• 1/13 - “We want the Patriots to win (lose)” (1)
• 1/12 - “Washing my face in the kitchen sink” (1)
• 1/11 - “First ever post not written by me, but probably my best” (1)
• 1/10 - “Will Smith is a stupid shitbag” (1)
• 1/9 - “Amy Fisher is hotter than Princess Diana, sorry” (1)
• 1/8 - “Depressed skydiving instructor” (2)
• 1/7 - “Why I’m a great human being” (0)
• 1/6 - “Come on doc, you know you wanna” (3)
• 1/5 - “I’d slit my wrists too if I owned a Roxette cassette” (0)
• 1/3 - “Barry Bonds rookie card” (0)
• 1/2 - “Ashley Madison has a big wet orgasm on a pile of money as your heart breaks” (0)
• 1/1 - “Pairs of socks” (0)

2007 (231)

• 12/30 - “Getting grandma high” (1)
• 12/28 - “Confessions of a fat slob” (0)
• 12/26 - “I hope it’s a catered affair” (1)
• 12/25 - “Atheists with coupons still don’t get into heaven” (0)
• 12/24 - “Poor Dane Cook” (0)
• 12/23 - “Please just watch the road” (0)
• 12/21 - “Ew threshold” (0)
• 12/20 - “Best gay joke ever” (0)
• 12/19 - “The Simpsons test” (0)
• 12/18 - “Black mannequins” (0)
• 12/17 - “A little early, no?” (1)
• 12/16 - “Selective reporting” (2)
• 12/14 - “Ties and t-shirts” (2)
• 12/13 - “Raw food and my feminine side” (3)
• 12/12 - “It never gets old” (2)
• 12/11 - “I really do feel bad about that” (2)
• 12/10 - “For all your advertising needs, feel free to come to me Gillette” (3)
• 12/9 - “Just like a commercial” (0)
• 12/8 - “Roulette, stupid old wives game — perfect for me” (0)
• 12/7 - “Date rapists are such pussies” (1)
• 12/6 - “So you wanna be a gynecologist?” (2)
• 12/5 - “I’m still pissed, mom” (0)
• 12/4 - “I don’t think it’s gonna ever be back” (0)
• 12/3 - “So what exactly is wrong with you?” (0)
• 12/2 - “East coast bias” (0)
• 12/1 - “Rabbits make terrible pets, right?” (2)
• 11/30 - “The nothing people” (0)
• 11/29 - “I’m not giving you shit if you lie to me” (0)
• 11/28 - “Holocaust jokes don’t really fly at Jewish singles events” (2)
• 11/27 - “Girls have it right” (0)
• 11/26 - “Thick skin” (0)
• 11/25 - “Yes. We’re brothers” (2)
• 11/16 - “Sing Happy Birthday, assholes” (0)
• 11/15 - “Either play beer-pong or lick the bottom of my shoes” (0)
• 11/14 - “Please explain to me how the WNBA still exists” (2)
• 11/13 - “Best way to advertise for fibersomething” (0)
• 11/12 - “We’re fucked up” (2)
• 11/11 - “Rock n’ roll Ralphs” (0)
• 11/9 - “I chose not to become a doctor” (0)
• 11/8 - “User names and passwords” (0)
• 11/7 - “Open space” (3)
• 11/6 - “Real name” (0)
• 11/5 - “Underrated fashion foresight” (1)
• 11/4 - “Versatile contestant” (1)
• 11/2 - “Tammy Reid - worst mother ever” (0)
• 11/1 - “Eat all Halloween candy” (2)
• 10/31 - “Annual Horah injuries” (0)
• 10/30 - “Completely made up dream interpretations” (2)
• 10/29 - “Burping and farting females” (0)
• 10/27 - “Would you bang a hot retard?” (2)
• 10/25 - “By the way, Peppermint Patty probably isn’t a lesbian” (2)
• 10/24 - “Osama bin Laden DVD box set - the perfect holiday gift” (1)
• 10/22 - “Am I being logical or paranoid?” (0)
• 10/20 - “Idea for a Halloween costume” (0)
• 10/19 - “I thought Ellen was the man of the relationship” (0)
• 10/18 - “Backpacks, man-purses, and my own immaturity” (3)
• 10/17 - “Christian anal virginity” (0)
• 10/15 - "Fantasy Bass Fishing" (2)
• 10/14 - “Humidity & wind chill factor” (1)
• 10/13 - “Jerking off, then trying to shit” (2)
• 10/11 - “New rule” (2)
• 10/10 - “Skipping” (0)
• 10/9 - “Airport security pretty much rapes old people” (0)
• 10/8 - “Bluejeans philosophies” (0)
• 10/7 - “Yelling from cars” (2)
• 10/5 - “Amish comas” (0)
• 10/3 - “Satan worshippers” (1)
• 10/2 - “Drinkin’ water” (1)
• 10/1 - “The story of Murray’s Supreme Hair Dressing Pomade” (1)
• 9/30 - “So you had a bad day?” (0)
• 9/27 - “And you think I’m a complaining Jew? Wow.” (0)
• 9/26 - “To the defense of The Sizzler” (0)
• 9/25 - “Apology to people who have had sex changes” (0)
• 9/24 - “But I only eat fish” (2)
• 9/23 - “Fibbing treadmills” (0)
• 9/22 - “Fuck G-d” (1)
• 9/21 - “Ringside Liquor” (1)
• 9/19 - “Cool new people” (0)
• 9/18 - “You haven’t earned the right to wear that” (0)
• 9/17 - “Misogyny and optimism” (1)
• 9/15 - “T-shirts with words on them” (1)
• 9/13 - “My mom’s left-wing politics nearly killed me” (1)
• 9/12 - “Always keep hard copies of records when you make friendly bets” (1)
• 9/11 - “Radio techniques” (0)
• 9/10 - “Oh stop, you’re just as creepy” (2)
• 9/9 - “Show for retards” (1)
• 9/8 - “Shopping for shoes like it’s a Super Toy Run” (2)
• 9/6 - “First ever blog dedication — for Tyler” (2)
• 9/5 - “Kanye West & 50 Cent” (1)
• 9/4 - “Life is unfair” (1)
• 9/3 - “Grammar manifesto” (1)
• 9/2 - “People who think they can find anything on the Internet III” (3)
• 8/31 - “I thought you were good at numbers” (1)
• 8/29 - “My 2nd deepest darkest fear” (0)
• 8/28 - “Eh, we went to the moon” (0)
• 8/27 - “Beans and pointless math” (1)
• 8/25 - “I guess it’s genetic” (0)
• 8/23 - “Ziploc makes $6.5 billion yearly—how much from drugs?” (1)
• 8/22 - “Tell me if this makes any sense” (3)
• 8/21 - “Please show that on TV” (0)
• 8/19 - “Don’t bring your fucking baby to Sunset Junction” (0)
• 8/17 - “3 impossible feats that guys can’t do” (0)
• 8/16 - “Look at me being all complimentary” (2)
• 8/14 - “Why is there no people food?” (1)
• 8/13 - “Suggestions for Hallmark” (0)
• 8/11 - “Environmentally conscious vagabonds” (0)
• 8/10 - “If I went into confessional, it might sound like…” (0)
• 8/9 - “Two awesomely terrible pick-up lines” (1)
• 8/8 - “Stupid salad” (1)
• 8/7 - “Better option for school shooters” (0)
• 8/4 - “Myspace messages from people that don’t exist” (0)
• 8/2 - “Lesbians in kilts” (0)
• 8/1 - “Fuck Goofy, I shoulda sued” (0)
• 7/30 - “Che Guevara” (1)
• 7/29 - “People in their twenties that say they never want kids” (3)
• 7/27 - “A pimple, yay?” (0)
• 7/24 - “Check mirrors before spitting?” (0)
• 7/23 - “ESPN is not only greedy, but also quite dumb” (2)
• 7/19 - “Mutilation and circumcision are not the same thing” (1)
• 7/18 - “Take a number, and shove it up your ass” (0)
• 7/15 - “A-Date” (0)
• 7/13 - “Jason exists, and is a psycho………no really” (0)
• 7/11 - “Cubicle decorations” (2)
• 7/10 - “Do not play Hangman with black people” (2)
• 7/7 - “Obsessions, confessions, and overused phrases” (0)
• 7/5 - “Homos in outer space” (1)
• 7/2 - “Wednesday off is weird” (0)
• 7/1 - “More hostility towards cigarette smokers” (1)
• 6/29 - “See, recycling can be disgusting” (0)
• 6/28 - “You are not a pornstar” (1)
• 6/27 - “I can hear your music through your headphones” (0)
• 6/25 - “Summer Solstice, truly the longest day of the year” (0)
• 6/18 - “5 random underrated sitcom characters” (1)
• 6/17 - “LA Parks Department is sexist” (0)
• 6/15 - “I know nothing about technology, but am awaiting…” (0)
• 6/13 - “The hypocrisy of alcohol and sports” (0)
• 6/12 - “Dead people aren’t always attractive” (1)
• 6/11 - “Cheetos should come with latex gloves included” (1)
• 6/9 - "The pen is no longer mightier than the sword, it is the sword" (1)
• 6/8 - “It’s okay to steal tips when…” (0)
• 6/7 - “I plan to kill a biker” (0)
• 6/6 - “Human-man: a real hero” (0)
• 6/3 - “People who buy DVD’s just to fill up their rack” (1)
• 6/1 - “Michael Vick sucks at life” (1)
• 5/29 - “Dirty wordy gurdy answers” (1)
• 5/26 - “First ever interactive blog, dirty wordy gurdy” (1)
• 5/25 - “The best thing about joining a band or owning a horse” (0)
• 5/22 - “People in my building that walk by me with their heads down” (0)
• 5/21 - “Anybody who texts a vote for anything ever” (0)
• 5/15 - “Interleague play” (0)
• 5/14 - “Dreamgirls couldn’t figure itself out” (1)
• 5/10 - “Why Pinocchio was a traumatic experience” (0)
• 5/8 - “The Secret” (1)
• 5/6 - “Hair gel and usage of the letter x” (1)
• 5/4 - “Things Paris Hilton will say while spending time in prison” (0)
• 5/1 - “I live an extreme lifestyle” (0)
• 4/30 - “Sheryl Crow knows nothing about my asshole” (1)
• 4/28 - “I think I might need to lose some weight because…” (1)
• 4/26 - “Booger Eaters” (0)
• 4/25 - “Bread butts/end pieces” (0)
• 4/24 - “You’re some basketball player” (0)
• 4/23 - “He committed paraphernalia and they threw him in prison” (0)
• 4/22 - “Question about genetics” (1)
• 4/20 - “Arguments against the courtesy flush” (1)
• 4/19 - “Russian hockey players are dumb” (0)
• 4/18 - “Horses getting high in the parking lot” (0)
• 4/17 - "I already checked" (0)
• 4/15 - “How horny is Rachel Robinson?” (0)
• 4/14 - “Tattoos on hot chixes” (1)
• 4/13 - "Volleyball is for maniacs and murderers" (0)
• 4/12 - “Don Imus and Anna Nicole Smith’s baby!” (0)
• 4/10 - “Blogfunk” (1)
• 4/7 - “Front door, back door” (1)
• 4/5 - “Sad News” (0)
• 4/3 - “Best way to drive drunk” (0)
• 4/2 - “Get your plastic surgery done over the weekend” (0)
• 3/30 - “Frogs and toads wrestle” (0)
• 3/29 - “Is it confusing when Snoop Dogg needs a chisel?” (0)
• 3/28 - “FM Oldies stations that cut extended solos from songs” (0)
• 3/27 - “I can’t wait for conservatives to…” (0)
• 3/26 - “Bozzz breaking promises” (0)
• 3/24 - “How do color blind people eat jellybeans?” (0)
• 3/23 - “Perhaps it might be time to change my ways” (0)
• 3/21 - “Some things Sanjaya can do” (0)
• 3/20 - “Gas vs. Cigarettes” (1)
• 3/18 - “Hungry Hungry Hippos is propaganda” (0)
• 3/16 - “Even Jesus couldn’t help me with my bracket” (1)
• 3/14 - “Wave at cars with tinted windows” (0)
• 3/13 - “Advice for terrorists” (0)
• 3/12 - “Is it easier to…?” (0)
• 3/10 - “Bowling is for everyone” (0)
• 3/9 - “What can be cute?” (1)
• 3/6 - “Get rid of helmets in hockey” (0)
• 3/5 - “Lack of jukebox foresight” (0)
• 3/3 - “Lesbian animals” (0)
• 3/2 - “Advertising for The Forward” (0)
• 2/28 - “Tim Hardaway’s grammar” (0)
• 2/27 - “It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye” (0)
• 2/26 - “It’s just a rumor, just a rumor” (0)
• 2/24 - “Ice Breakers Sours” (0)
• 2/23 - “Paula Abdul-Jabbar” (0)
• 2/22 - “Is it really that exciting to drive alongside of somebody you know?” (0)
• 2/21 - "Wanting to write a blog, but not having one to write" (1)
• 2/19 - “The real father of Bridget Moynahan’s baby” (0)
• 2/15 - “PeOpLe ThAt TyPe LiKe ThIs” (1)
• 2/13 - “People who think they can find anything on the Internet II” (0)
• 2/12 - “Jesus Takes the Wheel! (and avoids traffic)” (2)
• 2/11 - “Karma, football predictions, free drinks, and Justin Timberlake” (0)
• 2/9 - “How long I gotta wait til I can use Anna Nicole Smith for material?” (1)
• 2/8 - “Richard Simmons” (0)
• 2/7 - “Soccer Riots” (0)
• 2/5 - “I am not a racist, but…” (0)
• 2/4 - “Fuck (F-u-c-k T-o-p 8)…for now” (0)
• 2/2 - “Who’s worse, Chris Daughtry or Adolf Hitler?” (0)
• 2/1 - “Fuck you, I’m a cat” (0)
• 1/29 - “Wolfgang Van Halen” (0)
• 1/28 - “Considerations for banning transfat” (0)
• 1/24 - “Things that will occur before Chinese Democracy is released” (0)
• 1/23 - “What I expect from my future wife” (0)
• 1/22 - “”Words that are pronounced in more than one way” (0)
• 1/19 - “Homeless beggars that set up camp in stupid spots that make no sense” (1)
• 1/17 - “Faith in humankind reaffirmed in the supermarket” (0)
• 1/16 - “Simon Cowell” (0)
• 1/14 - “My deepest darkest fear” (1)
• 1/12 - “Working on Martin Luther King Day” (0)
• 1/11 - “Private profiles” (0)
• 1/10 - “Betty White’s invincibility” (0)
• 1/9 - “Stench in NYC” (0)
• 1/7 - “Tribute to James Brown - the blackest man of all time” (1)
• 1/5 - “Vaginal Rejuvenation Tour 2007?” (0)
• 1/2 - “Grandpa’s teeth” (1)

2006 (42)

• 12/21 - “Home Depot commercial jingle” (0)
• 12/20 - “People who don’t think this is the funniest story ever” (0)
• 12/18 - “These prick-bastards who wear O.J. Simpson USC jerseys” (0)
• 12/17 - “Parents putting videos of their infants playing harmonica on Youtube” (0)
• 12/15 - “Trey Anastasio” (0)
• 12/14 - “The new east coast/west coast war” (0)
• 12/13 - “Don Carmen” (2)
• 12/12 - “Insecurity of Americans to accept the usefulness of a bidet” (1)
• 12/11 - “Invisible creatures that take our shit when we ain’t lookin” (0)
• 12/9 - “Wikipedia’s excludng of spinoff names for Baba Booey” (1)
• 12/8 - “Rolling Stone magazine’s list of the 89 most redundant, repetitive cliches in music” (0)
• 12/7 - “You artsy liberal hip Mac users” (0)
• 12/6 - “Pedestrian rebelliousness in the presence of the elderly and handicapped” (0)
• 12/5 - “Going to the gym, sitting in the parking lot for 45 minutes, then leaving” (0)
• 12/4 - “The NY sports media” (0)
• 12/3 - “My cat’s disdain for paper towels” (0)
• 12/2 - “Leaders from different countries speaking at podiums on top steps of historical sites” (0)
• 12/1 - “White socks” (0)
• 11/30 - “Accidental viewings of she-male porn from misleading thumbnails” (0)
• 11/29 - “Proposed name change for Baba Booey” (0)
• 11/28 - “Those not recognizing the true hero of the Michael Richards racist rant” (0)
• 11/26 - “Long white t-shirt wearin’ mofos” (0)
• 11/24 - “Ray Charles” (0)
• 11/22 - “AT&T” (0)
• 11/21 - “My relationship with waiters/waitresses” (0)
• 11/20 - “People who have had sex change operations” (0)
• 11/17 - “People who think they can find anything on the Internet” (0)
• 11/16 - “Serena Williams” (1)
• 11/15 - “People who think the War in Iraq is a conundrum” (0)
• 11/13 - “Sir Mix-A-Lot” (0)
• 11/10 - “Mayonnaise” (0)
• 11/7 - “Oprah’s studio audience” (1)
• 11/6 - "People who think I’m ambidextrous" (0)
• 10/30 - “Critics of the Ultimate Warrior” (0)
• 10/24 - “People that say the book is always better than the movie” (0)
• 10/20 - “Myself” (0)
• 10/13 - “Scientology” (0)
• 10/6 - “Twins Catcher Joe Mauer” (0)
• 9/18 - “Super Mario Bros. 2″ (0)
• 9/13 - “People that root for teams outside their geographical region” (0)
• 9/10 - “CW11″ (0)
• 9/7 - “On Notice - Comment Deleters, Wikipedia fraud, the Paparazzi” (0)